Long day

I am so tired, I shouldn't even be posting tonight. I drove the kids down to DC today, which is about 2 1/2 hours by car then another 45 minutes by train. We got there around 9 and then walked pretty much non stop until 7 or so. We even ate lunch on the go.

I couldn't take the kids to dinner because I WAS PICKPOCKETED! wtf? I guess a youngish woman with two little kids that are obviously tourists is an easy target. I never let my guard down, or so I thought. I'm thinking that I was tag teamed when a cr*ckhead looking lady started talking to me and asking me for money. We tried to stop and walk away but she followed us. I was in "momma bear, don't mess with me and my kids" mode. So I was pretty distracted and it would have been a good time for someone to reach right in there. I had to let the kids share my peanut butter cruch mf bar for their dinner :(

But, we defintely got our exercise in, and I stayed on plan...

I called Captial One, and there were already a bunch of charges to Metro, the subway system. I guess somebody got a few month passes or something. Grrr!

Even with all of that, the kids had a great time. We went to the zoo and the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History. We also walked around the Mall, saw the WWII, Lincoln, and Washington Memorials. Heck, they were happy just to take a train ride! So I'm glad they had fun, and I hope that crappy event didn't overshadow their good day.

Now it is time to tend to my poor, aching, blistered feet. Good night.

Still going strong

Ok, I've been a bad blogger and haven't posted for awhile. I've been active on the Medifast blogs, and it just doesn't transfer well. Nothing major has gone down over the past week or so, just lots of school work and mom stuff. So here are just some random updates on the progress.

But anywho, I'm still working Medifast...Day 16 and 11 pounds lighter! The struggle with cravings is still there, but weaker. I've already been to two birthday parties and passed up on cupcakes when they are staring me in the face.

I'm actually enjoying the preparation of my lean and green meals. Before this, I just felt too busy to cook.

Eating in the cafeteria has not been a problem. I just bring something I can eat with a spoon. Typically a soup or oatmeal.

It's so weird to think that I may actually stick with this. Dieting has obviously not been my strong suit in the past.

I did redo my goals. I'm only 3 pounds away from my first goal which is to be below a BMI of 40. The next goal is to have a BMI below 30, but since it's such a stretch, there are 2 mini goals in between. After that, the next goal is to have a BMI below 25.

OMG!!! Just as I typed this last sentence, my daughter waved a yummy turkey and cheddar on wheat with brown mustard. My favorite sammich ever! She asked if I wanted a bite and I said no thank you. Last month, I practically would have ripped it out of her hands! Maybe this plan is working better than I thought!

Day 4

So here it is, near the end of day 4. It has been very easy to stick to the plan during the day...which is a feat considering I eat in a cafeteria every day and there are lots of yummy things for sale. The evenings are kind of hard. That is when I get lots of cravings, but I have survived and stayed on the plan. And it's paying off. I have now lost five pounds in four days! I can see why this plan works. The online tools for medifast are unmatched. They have the easiest calorie counter I've ever seen, all their products are logged, you just click on what you ate that day. It tells your daily calorie deficit for the day. Much easier than extrapounds.com (which is also great). I even went into a chat room on the medifast site and someone directed me to the forums where there are tons of modification recipes. You can make a small "cake" from a hot chocolate mix or plain chocolate mix. You can use the parmesean puffs to bread chicken. There are bread, pancake, brownie, and chip recipes. I'm going to use a cream of brocoli soup mix tonight and make chips from it. The lean and green meals have been good. The first three nights I had big omelettes. Tonight I made a montreal steak salad from boca burgers, montreal seasoning, spinach, mushrooms, parmesean cheese, and light blue cheese dressing. It was actually really good.

Tomorrow will be hard because it is my mom's birthday and we are going out to Olive Garden for dinner. It's somewhere I like to eat, but hardly ever go, so I will be very tempted to get my standard order: Italian Margarita (tons of carbs) and Seafood Pasta (even more carbs) and of course breadsticks....geez, if it were for anyone else but my mom, I wouldn't go. It's just like an alcoholic walking into a bar...same difference. I'm hoping to get some kind of a salad and grilled chicken/shrimp without dressing, which I'm sure will not taste nearly as good as what everyone else is having. But I know that being thinner and healthier is much better than a plate of pasta and breadsticks - then again, that's where the addiction comes in. In the moment, the consequences mean nothing to me, all I can do is think about instant gratification and strong urges.

I'm sure it will be fine, and once I leave the restaurant, temptation will pass. I just need to be strong.

Nothing will ever taste as good as being thin will feel.

Day 3

So Day one was easy to follow the plan at school. After the kids went to bed, it was harder to control my cravings and impulses. Actually, it was torture.

Yesterday was day 2. I was at clinical and on the road most of the day. Keeping busy was definitely a great way to keep my mind off dieting, but difficult to fit in four small meals. Yesterday evening was better, but still difficult. On the upside, I have lost 4 pounds in 2 days! I know that it's 'water weight' but that is ok with me because my ankles have been swollen for months and I can visibly notice them going down!

I am running low on energy today, but I'm thinking it's from crappy sleep not the diet. Will definitely be using the momentum cappucino today!

Here's hoping that today is a good day!

The time has come.

Day 1 is here! As I type this, I'm eating my first medifast meal - peach oatmeal. It is nice to have something warm and filling for breakfast. I'm eating it slowly to help myself feel full. Since I can't have coffee the way I like it (with creamer) I'm having a diet soda with my breakfast. It will be difficult to schedule meals around class on Monday and Wednesday, but I have breaks and will either squeeze in a bar or a shake...yes I'm bringing both because I don't know what I will be hungry for. I will try to post later about how day 1 went.

Day 1 weight: 261.6 lbs
Short term goal weight: 210 lbs
Long term goal weight: 145 lbs

It's my fault.

my blog: "I haven't always been this big (255 lbs, 5'5'). In high school, I comfortably fit into a size 8. And after my first child, I was a 10/12. I can remember the exact moment things changed for me. I went through a very hard point in my life which involved the loss of a child, death of my father, and the ending of a relationship with a man I thought was the one. I would just binge and binge. I knew it wasn't good or healthy, but I didn't care. I just figured I would gain 5 or 10 pounds and then work it off. That was a little over 100 pounds and 4 years ago. It's my fault. It's time to take responsibility and do what needs to be done - even if it's not fun or comforting. I know that in the long run, being healthier, lighter, and slimmer will be rewarding in so many ways.

I'm starting to realize that my size is interfering in my life. I can't get up and down the same, buckling seatbelts is harder, even getting my shoes on is harder. How did I let this happen? I am 29, and in about 6 1/2 months I will be 30. I want to be able to celebrate that day and feel good about myself. I don't want to feel bad and out of shape.

So here it goes. Giving in to cravings nonstop has turned me into someone I'm ashamed of. I would never want my father, whom I believe is in Heaven, seeing me like this. I WILL lose this weight, and I WILL live a healthier, more active life!"

getting anxious

my blog: "Just like those who quit smoking, I'm quitting an addiction too. Of course it is food. I decided to set a quit date...Monday. I have tried so many diets, a few have worked well, and those have been very low calorie and exercise. One of my biggest weaknesses is making bad choices and chosing convenience. So with that in minde, I'm going to try Medi-Fast. I just got my shipment in the mail. It is optimistic to see the variety when the shipment comes - 2 big boxes full of all different kinds of bars, soups, chili, puddings, oatmeals, and shakes. I ordered the cappucino and cream of chicken soup too. I think there will be enough variety to keep me from getting bored quickly. And they are easy to make too...

I'm excited to start, and really want to start tomorrow, but I just bought fresh fruit and milk that will waste if I don't use it."